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The Dawn of Hope -paul vattikuti

"And HOPE does not disappoint us,because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit,whom he has given us"- Romans 5:5
It was a pleasant evening as I walked through the park.Beautiful flowers greeted my eyes at every gaze.I just came for a walk after visiting the hospital as I was constrained to go as I was feeling giddy from past few days.As I was going back home,I happened to see this beautiful Park.I was very happy as my fiancé was going to visit me in 3 months. This was a beautiful park,with a pathway encircling a beautiful clean pond which had a fountain in between.I stood across a fence encircling the pond and saw the sunset.The scenery won my heart.I praised God for my life and for the wonders he showed me.I heard a man talking on the phone,I suppose he was talking to his wife.There before him was a cute little girl who was clapping and smiling looking at the man.I went and greeted them.The girl did not reply me,but the man did."Hi", the man said .He told that he was talking to his wife on the phone and the little girl was his daughter.We talked together for a long time .It felt that I knew them from ages.At the end of the day I felt good having a chat with them.However the little girl did not pay much attention to me and went to play .We talked about our lives and all the common questions.That place had something for me.
I went there again on Sunday evening as that was the only time I used to be free.I saw the man and the girl again.The man was talking to his wife,and as usual the girl used to see her dad talk and she Used to smile and clap.I kept on coming every Sunday only to find the man talking to his wife."What a beautiful instance of Love!",I exclaimed with my jaws open.We both had a talk and I went back home and went to sleep.
My eyes opened as my phone rang.the call was from the hospital .They told me to visit the doctor and take the reports.I dint know,that its gona be my deepest fear confronting me.I went into the cabin and the doctor greeted me,"Hey Sarah,how are you doing?"
I said am fine.I enquired of him that, is there anything serious cause I wasn't expecting it to be.The doctors face lowered as if he was trying to conceal something.He told,"Look Sarah ,the thing am gona say now may shock you but please don't panic" He was already making me scared as I prepared my self mentally .The words which he said till today whirl inside my head.,"Sarah you are suffering from cancer"
This was it.My biggest fear had quelled my courage ,my faith in God.
I couldn't believe what he said.I mean how is it possible I was fine before ..Why is it me!!!
I spent that very night crying,screaming at the top of my voice with every emotion screeching out in pain .I did not tell this to my parents or to my fiancé .I went to the park the other day evening.I was heart broken and felt helpless.There in front of me was the pond.I decided that I would end my life.I couldn't live with this monster living inside me which could restrict me to live my Life.I wanted no one to see what I am doing.Straight beside me were sitting the father and daughter pair.As usual he was talking to his wife.I was waiting for them to go.I got the chance when her daughter asserted her father for a ice cream.The man got up leaving his phone on the bench.As I looked at the phone I was surprised to see no one on the call.Infact the phone was switched off.Who was he talking to all these days!.As he came back ,I asked him about this weird behaviour.,"To whom were you talking keeping your phone switched off?" The man smiled at me and said,"You caught me.hehe"
He told me to sit and narrated me his past.
"I met my wife in this garden.We had a chat and eventually this became monotonous for us.We fell in love with each other.She worked for a international organization which kept her onboard every 2 months.We married each other and were blessed with this beautiful daughter.Unfortunately my little princess had hearing and speaking disability.she does not hear anything,neither she utters a word.Still we were quite happy.My wife's busy schedule used to keep her out of country.But still we used to make up for it and used to talk hours in the evening right at this place.Once when I came here and called her,she did not pick up my call,I tried it again and again but to no avail.Then my phone rang.It was her friend.She told one of the shocking news of my life.My wife Died!!! she met with an accident.I broke into tears .I stepped out of my bench and began walking towards the pond to quit my life .As I was going to take the step,my daughter Got hold of my hand.Her innocence wouldn't let me take the step.Days after it my daughter started missing her mother.I tried to make reasons and kept her quite.but it was getting hard.So from that day ,every Sunday I started pretending as If I was talking to my wife just to satisfy my daughter with the contentment that I am in touch with her .She used to get happy and clap whenever she used to see me talking to my wife.I don't know how much time I will keep Lieing to my self and to my daughter.I don't know how much time I will keep satisfying myself and my daughter with false hope.But I don't care I'll try my best to keep her happy."
The man was in tears so was I.
I did not think of my family and my fiancé.This made me so selfish that I thought to end my life.This was so rude of me.I decided not to end my life but to live for others who care for me.My faith in God came back as he turned the events of this evening at the right nick of time.
Sometimes we are burdened under the command of problems in our life .We try ending it just to justify that no one has endured greater persecution than us.At that very moment ,look at the people around you,they may seem to be happy but they aren't .The only thing that keeps them going is the hope that they get from their loved ones.Don't take a step which may prove to be fatal.May God bless you and raise a DAWN OF HOPE in your life..Thank u..Stay blessed

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